Post Facebook – Sort of…

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By SheelaR
After seven stressful years, I’ve pulled the plug on my Facebook page. No regrets. Although, I am leaving behind a lot of people whose company I really enjoyed. I will truly miss this time away from you. There are also a lot of people that I won’t even give a second thought to L  I had been tossing around the idea of walking away for quite a while, but some of my lovelier friendships, kept me from doing that. However, the stress of dealing with people and situations that were unhealthy, made the decision to walk away all too easy. 
I got to a point where I started to hate people just because they were breathing. I also found myself nursing a lot of anger. I don’t want to live like that anymore. The only thing you can control in any situation is yourself. So here I am.  I have to learn to simply appreciate and enjoy the people in my life that love me just because.  They don’t require a dog and pony show, to be content with my existence in their lives. All I want is to be a work in progress and to keep progressing. I can’t do that if I’m saddled with anger and malcontent. 
Don’t get me wrong…. There are a lot of amazing people on Facebook. Unfortunately, there are few that make the environment too hostile to be content in. I really will miss some of the spirited debates, as well as the randomly funny ones, and the meaningless and meaningful discussions. I’ll miss you, just because… I hate that I let the ugliness of it all define my time there, because it had been on occasion, a place of endless enjoyment. My need for growth and development dictated that I walk away before becoming thoroughly emotionally stunted. The lows were starting to outnumber the highs.
I can only hope that anyone who cared about me will understand my need for a solace and solitude…away from the book. Just know that your friendships means much more than you’ll ever realize.  However, I’m a natural loner… I can’t do this thing called life in front of a crowd. Maybe with a little time away and a new perspective, I can rejoin you on the book, but for now…I must retreat to a healthier time and place.

About Me…

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SheelaR
I’m SheelaR. Just a little about my blog and I. I’m a creative overachiever, who’s not big on being the forthcoming type. I’m acutely private, as you may have already figured out. I’m a nerdy academic; the artsy crafty bohemian chic type. Bookish. A tree-hugging bleeding heart abstract and critical thinker. I’m a reserved in my morals, but I never pass up the opportunity to be the life of the party – when called upon. I’m agonizingly self-conscious, yet I often leave the house without brushing my hair. I’m everything you can imagine, and its opposite. Putting my actual self out there has always been a prospect I’ve met with dread and swift rebuke, which is often in opposition of my occasional need to overshare. I’m always and forever in direct conflict with myself. 
I’ve never wanted to be thought of as an ordinary person, or one that has nothing significant or worthwhile to ever contribute. I shy away from mundane interests which I perceive to be frivolous. So for the greater part, I have gone through life quietly studying and consuming the world. This has been mired by my insatiable need to learn. For me, staying alive means streamlining and regimenting every aspect of my life, down to the thoughts I’ve allowed myself to acknowledge and the interests I allowed myself to develop. Otherwise, it just seems too loud inside my head. But that’s no way to live, not sustainably. Over time, I have discovered that I am full of thoughts and experiences that leave me with an almost insatiable desire to go beyond mere consumption, and I really want to talk about them… This is where my blogging comes in. 
Before I started blogging, I had been scratching this writing itch as a ghost writer for several printed and online magazines/publications. Ghosting became a active part of my life. 🙂 Without notice, I suddenly burned out. I made a hasty retreat into into a quiet uneventful life, which included deactivating my online presence. I retreated to a quieter, less complex existence. Ironically, I find myself in need of a quieter place to live and love…again. 
Anyways…
One Counter Culture was borne out of a desperate will to exist in more than just one dimension. I want to strike a balance and not have to negate one element of my truth for the other. So, One Counter Culture is about embracing the possibility of a nuanced, beautifully complex life. It’s a hodgepodge random place of expression. One Counter Culture offers a wealth of the meaningful and meaningless; engaging in critical thought; and being honest in sharing the sometimes-difficult realities that preoccupy my mind…because there are enough rose-tinted blogs. I want to be and do all of these things at once because I absolutely can. 
It has taken me a while to finally grow out of the trope of cynical selfloathing millennials, who hold any and everything reminiscent of millennialism in contempt. Although, I still struggle with these feelings. However, I am here now, on the blogosphere, carving out and curating a space where I can express my trivial interests alongside the more grave; where without pretence, I can assert that Intellectualism and being a sentient, temporal, worldly being are not mutually exclusive; where I can make a reasoned participation in the human experience.
Through this blog, I want to contribute to a culture of sharing – without the shame. I seek to make meaningful connections with people of like mind and differing experience. I hope this resonates with you. I want this blog to be more than my mental playground. I want to bring more content that you can relate to and have never considered. Feedback, good, bad or indifferent…is always welcomed. 

Tamir Rice – WHEN JUSTICE ISN’T JUSTICE AT ALL.

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SheelaR

There are certain things that no child should ever experience – death by a bullet is one of them. I can’t
imagine sending my child out to play, only to never see him alive again. I’ve never had an issue with the police, but this was bullsh*t – a of total disregard for a precious human life. It was utter and complete recklessness…and nothing less.

You cannot reasonably justify or reconcile the killing of unarmed men, women, and children…of any color, ethnic origin, or religion. More than my sadness, I’m angry. I’m angry that this child’s life has been chalked up to “a perfect storm of human error.” It was a perfect storm of malice.

On a Saturday afternoon, November 2014 – A 911 caller reported that there was someone at a Cleveland playground “waving a gun around at people.” The caller reported that it was possibly a juvenile, and that his weapon was “possibly a fake.” Within minutes of that call, Officers’ Frank Garmback and Timothy Loehmann arrived to the playground. Before their car came to a complete stop, Loehmann jumped out, and without, shot Tamir Rice in the chest. Literally one second after exiting his vehicle… It took four minutes after Tamir was shot before any aid was even rendered. Tamir was rushed to the hospital, where he later died. 
I would say that Loehmann gunned Tamir down like an animal, but we don’t even treat animals that way.  We actually live in a country where animal lives are valued over those of blacks. That poor child never stood a chance against Loehmann’s eagerness to discharge his weapon. Tamir Rice was an innocent; a sitting duck, waiting for his executioner.  If those officers thought for one second that he was a threat or a danger, why exit the safety of their vehicle with reckless abandon? Why not give him ample opportunity to follow some sort of directive? That didn’t happen, because Loehmann’s inability and immaturity left him incapable of good judgement…where there should have copious amounts of it.
In America, there is an state-sanctioned devaluation of black life – an automatic presumption of guilt that has permeated our legal system. We’ve come to expect justice that just isn’t for us. Although, what happened to Tamir Rice should be of concern and importance to all Americans…not just it’s black ones. Police brutality and subsequent cover-ups and prosecutorial inaction and misconduct, may affect the black community at higher rates, but every American is subject to find himself on receiving end of it. No one is policing our system of law-enforcement, and that in itself, is a huge problem. The only recourse available to the Rice family is a civil lawsuit. However, there is a sliver of hope that the Department of Justice will open it’s own investigation. We know how that turned out for Ferguson, Missouri, so expectations are tentative.Tamir bares no responsibility whatsoever for his own death. All the arguments for why he should not have been in that park with a realistic-looking gun, are born out of racial biases and ignorance.  Little boys have been playing with guns for forever. Tamir was no different. He was twelve. He didn’t have the emotional maturity to wonder if or be concerned if his black skin would make his a moving target for the police. He was simply a child at play.  Black parents everywhere, can no longer allow their little boys to be boys, without first arming them with the knowledge that their lives have no value in America, and at any innocent moment, they may find themselves on the receiving end of a bullet or prison.

A horrible irony…Ohio is an open carry state, and no one open-carrying has been killed by the police.

Recent events have made me afraid to raise a black child in America. How do we protect our little black children when there is zero recourse for their egregious deaths at the hands of law enforcement? Tamir’s murder was just another blip on Loehmann’s career. He gets to remain free and gainfully employed; Tamir will forever be twelve. There are so many things wrong with that and no one is trying to right them. At one point in Loehmann’s career, it was noted that he was “immature” with his weapon, somehow…he was left to his own devices just long enough to murder Tamir. We are living in perilous times, especially if you’re black in America. This is yet another stain on and disgrace for America.

If you’re not familiar with the story, I’ve attached links below, which includes a video – It’s compelling and disturbing to watch:

http://www.vox.com/2014/12/3/7326243/tamir-rice-police-contradictions

http://abcnews.go.com/US/tamir-rice-case-prosecutor-abused-manipulated-grand-jury/story?id=35979452

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/cleveland-police-officers-cleared-in-tamir-rice-shooting-prosecutor/ar-BBnZtE1?ocid=ansmsnnews11

The Sexual Exploitation of Black Girls

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By SheelaR

I was going to write a post about R. Kelly and his sordid history with underage girls…. However, I saw this link on Twitter… A first person perspective by Jamie Nesbitt Golden. Jamie’s writes about her experience as a sex assault victim. A profound read.
If you support his music, shame on you.
http://www.xojane.com/issues/fasttailedgirls-sexual-assault-of-black-girls-is-not-a-joke

I’m riding a crazy wave of insomnia tonight…ride with me or go to bed 😉 

To Midnight Mass or Not

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By SheelaR

I’ve been tossing around the idea of going to Midnight Mass with my parents this year. I haven’t been in about 2 years. I’ve been opting for morning mass, and I don’t attend the same church as my parents anymore. I live in a new community and thought it be best to form bonds here, and it’s simply more convenient.

Every Christmas we’d all go to Midnight Mass, and then my folks would host a big breakfast afterward. My mom and uncle would make bacon, eggs, muffins, potatoes O’Brien, a large bowl of fresh cut fruit, and hot tea & coffee. Church family and neighbors would come over and the revelry would go on for two or three hours in the morning. I still go for breakfast, but I thought it important to start some of my own traditions.

I always looked forward to it, because it was always fun and the the reason for some of my best holiday memories. There is something about Midnight Mass — the dark windows, the cool church, the reading from the Gospel of St. Matthew — that pulls me toward it. Maybe this year I’ll follow that pull, and…

Or maybe I’ll sleep through the night and continue with my new tradition… Maybe mom and dad will join me 🙂

Donald Trump – Purveyor of Hate and Intolerance

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By SheelaR

As we quickly approach the run for presidency, we find ourselves in the midst of a hell and brimstone three ring circus lead by Donald Trump. The candidacy and rhetoric of Donald Trump that has literally set U.S. race relations back more than 50 years. Mr Trump has made the most egregious forms of racism and intolerance openly acceptable by the GOP base. What we are witnessing folks, is a new, raw, and unbridled republican party. They are no longer interested in hiding behind clever euphemisms and doublespeak. They are loud and proud.

If elected, his “promises” may never come to fruition… However, his rhetoric is irresponsible and dangerous for Muslims, Latinos, and any minority community in this country. His thumbs up gives life to fear-based hate. We seemed to have forgotten that America was colonized by refugees fleeing from religious persecution. “Refugees” and “Religion” have now become dirty words when attempting to stoke fear and hate. This country has no room for anymore hate and intolerance.

Donald Trump is a fool cheered by fools and the willfully ignorant. We’ve seen him mock the disabled; engage in talk of rounding up and deporting Mexicans and Muslims; engage in the worst kind of misogyny; and elude to America engaging in religious persecutions.  Did I leave anything out? Oh, yes! He doesn’t seem to like or respect blacks either.

We have to find a meaningful way to shut down the hate rhetoric and lies from the lunatic ultra-right, which teaches their brainwashed foxbot followers that anyone who is not a lunatic rightist, is inferior and corrupt.  Their sick reactionary spewing’s and their cynically pre-planned responses to crises, are designed to attack the President and anyone attempting to challenge their twisted ideology.

The fact that no one on the right can even acknowledge that they are reactionary or even look up the means of that term, tells us how close to ugly ultra-right fascism these incendiary/inflammatory hate-mongers truly are. We are living in perilous times. We must band together and use our common sense and voting power to keep the Donald Trumps of the world out from ascending to power.

“Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.” -John Dalberg-Acton

Sandra Bland

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By SheelaR
However Sandra Bland died, be it at the hands of the police or by suicide… Imagine the despair she must have felt being locked up and treated like an animal, all because she vocalized her displeasure at being treated so poorly. It breaks my heart for her family. They’ll never have the closure they need to appropriately mourn her lost. I don’t know what happened, but through a series of images released of her in confinement, I saw a broken woman. No one should end up like that…not because of a minor traffic violation. Her arrest and death doesn’t make sense. 
I can’t imagine that happening to me, but in many ways, that could easily be me. If her death doesn’t touch you or make you think, you don’t have a heart or a brain.

Dear Black Men…

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By SheelaR

Just a thought before I retreat into my “me space.” This is for the men. If it doesn’t apply, let it fly. This is my personal feelings and you don’t need to be offended. If you are, those are your feelings and you own them.

It would be nice if you didn’t use your social media accounts for sharing overly-sexualized and degrading images of women of color. It is those types images that continue to be detrimental to our reputations. Most of us cannot relate to, nor do we engage in those types of behaviors. When you mindlessly share those images via social media, it gives life to harmful stereotypes that only serve to hurt the women that are your wives, mothers, sisters, and daughters.

I have no interest in feminism, if being objectified is the outcome. Women of color are the least loved, respected, and valued in our society. Please do your part to do better by us.

Ayesha Curry – Kept it Classy

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By SheelaR

Ayesha Curry, the wife of NBA Golden State player Stephen Curry, is in the middle of a social media firestorm after tweeting her fashion preferences, which were, that she preferred to cover some parts of her body instead of wearing more trendy revealing outfits. In the age of women like Nicki Minaj and Amber Rose the gentle lines of modesty have been completely obliterated. To be exact, Ayesha tweeted “Everyone’s into barely wearing clothes these days, huh? Not my style. I like to keep the good stuff covered up for the one who matters, ” Just looking at the latest fashion trends. I’ll take classy over trendy any day of the week.  #saturdaynightinsight” I’m frankly, very proud of her for saying that out loud.

There is something wrong with our society, when we give life to Amber Rose and her “Slut Shamming” campaign, but chastise women like Ayesha Curry, for simply expressing a preference for a more modest style of dress. If you want to behave and dress in revealing outfit or engage in slut-like behavior…by all means, but I’d like to ask you to rethink your position and attempts to mainstream behavior that only serve to denigrate women, especially women of color, who’ve already been unfairly and historically relegated to the role of sexual beings. There are little girls watching you, and they don’t need to be taught that behaving this way is goal they should strive for. Striving to be maligned and disrespected should never be any ones goal.

I don’t know how and when we managed to turn “trashy” and “slutty” behavior into a feminist issue. I’m all for women’s rights, but I draw the line at mainstreaming a movement that demoralizes women. That is an issue that has zero to do with leveling the playing field of opportunities and equality. There is no need to openly and brazenly sexualize your image, in an attempt to demand equality. Although, Ayesha was voicing her personal style, it has opened the door to some larger issues that women face in a society the marginalizes their value. It is a dialogue that has been a long time coming and desperately needed. After enduring said firestorm, Ayesha subsequently tweeted “Regardless of if you like my “style of clothes” or not (which I don’t care) please do not tear women down and degrade them… Not cool peeps.” Way to go, Ayesha! Stay unapologetic! 

It is best to be a part of a growing forest than a falling tree.

Not tonight :)

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By SheelaR

There is so much going on in the world and I came here with the intention to write about it, but my mood isn’t right. I’ve got a slow burn about some things, but I’m trying to stay center of any negative feelings and my body is tiring quickly. Maybe tomorrow…

On a lighter note… I’ve decided to make all the gifts I plan on giving for Christmas.  I’m very excited. I bought a crap-load of art supplies and I’ve managed to finish one gift so far. If I don’t forget, I’ll take a photo to share with you.